The voice on the other end of the line crackles. I for some reason picture the green metal phones used in M*A*S*H. I am always prone to forget you are a man now, a soldier not a cadet. I love that I swing on this pendulum of hate and nostalgia. I can't escape you in my life because I don't want to. I just wanted to escape waiting for you in a housedress in our bedroom while you were running from yourself in the arms of young girls.
We were never equals, we just took turns being superior. Now we are. Now I have a love for you I couldn't before. I don't have to waste time begging for affection and saving you from your ego. It's nice here. As much as you are on the other side of the world I feel close to you, a close I never felt naked next to you. I hated all the stolen moments. I will never miss those arms. Maybe I miss the drama at times, but not those arms. You never held me properly, it felt akward. The way he holds me feels perfect and you know it, and you observe it and you tell me. Now you have to come home, i'm just finished burying parts of you